In Which Sextus Knows He Knows

May 27, 1174

Envy this... resentment that... some bit about her sister... Sextus tried to look interested. He understood, of course, that the words of a concerned patron in need of guidance demanded his full attention, but it was difficult to focus on what Ivona was saying when her bodice had been laced to flatter her curvy figure. Of course, he might have preferred it unlaced--or, better yet, on the floor. The same could be said of the rest of her clothing.

She reached a lull in her explanation and stared at him--like she was expecting an answer. What had she been talking about, again? He searched his mind for the last bit he remembered. Oh yes... her sister. "So... are you anything like your sister, sweetheart?"

Her sea-blue eyes bulging for a second, she dismissed the thought with a wave of her hand--and a flash of gold around her finger. "I am happily married, thank you very much."

Sextus smirked. "So's your sister."

"So she thinks, perhaps." Ivona's pretty mouth curled with a nun-like disapproval. Granted, Sextus had known his fair share of sexy nuns. "Frankly, Father, I don't like where this conversation seems to be heading. I came to you for advice and you're not being helpful."

"And you, my dear--" He placed his hand on her bare forearm, only to have it yanked from his grasp "--seem to be averse to the idea of fun. Tell your sister to talk to me herself; maybe she'll be a little more cooperative."

He lifted his eyes from her breast just long enough to see a vein throb in her temple. Maybe the blood was finally starting to churn? "You're a horrible priest, you know that?"

"In my defense, I always wanted to a be a pirate instead." She sniffed, but it sounded indulgent. He would have to try a little harder. "How about yourself? Think you might have made a good sea wench?"

"That depends. I suppose it could have been agreeable as long as I was several nauts away from you."

Ouch. But no matter. Sextus was nothing if not persistent; after all, 'sex' was in his very name. "Oh, our ships would have crossed at some point, I'm sure."

Ivona shrugged, then turned around and strode toward the door. He might have been annoyed had the shawl around her waist not shed such light on her rear advantage. "Believe what you will, but you won't be making port in my harbor. Now, not a word about my sister's troubles to anyone, all right?"

"Very well." Shame. A tip about a loose village woman might have earned him a couple of free drinks from his brothers. But that which passed between a priest and his confessors was sacred, and maybe that applied to words as well as bodily fluids. And now that he thought about it, maybe it was best that only he knew of the woman's... difficulties? He placed his hand to his chin and looked to the window, trying to figure out when next his path might cross with that of Ivona's sister...

But the door opened and closed again before he'd had much of a chance to think. Sextus sighed. Today just wasn't his day, was it? "Yes?"

"Father." To his dismay, it was a male voice. Sextus turned around to see a tall young man making his way toward him. His hair was a shocking shade of red and he walked with a slight shuffle. Somehow, he looked a little familiar. "You remember me, right?"

Err... "Uh, well..."

"Searle Andronei."

That didn't help. "Who?"

"The Baron of Hoprine's second son."

Still nothing.

"My mother is your first cousin."

No, that still wasn't ringing any bells... Oh! Laughing at his own lapse in memory, Sextus clapped his hands together. Now he could recall how he knew this youngster! "A-ha! Didn't I buy some magic mushrooms from you on my way back from Rome last November?"

The young man blinked. Then again. Again. Then, finally-- "Sure. Why not?"

Sextus grinned. Even if his charm had failed him earlier, it was good to know that his mind, at least, was sharp as ever. "I knew I knew you from somewhere! Say, do you happen to have any on you right now?"

"No. I just sold my last pouch to some kid in the village." He sighed, his eyes rolling upward to the ceiling. Maybe he'd just downed a pouch himself. "Anyway, I'm staying at the local inn for a few days. Falidor let me in before he left for the night, but I can't find Lord Severin or any of his family, so I figured I'd come here and ask you. Do you know where Viridis is?"

Viridis. That was a nice name. But... "Who?"

The young man's eyes nearly popped out of his sockets. Those must have been some damn strong mushrooms. "Lord Severin's daughter."

"As of March, Lord Severin has five daughters."

The visitor caught his lip between his teeth. "The second one."

"And which one is that?" Their faces flashed across his mind's eye--as they did on occasion--but no names came to mind. "The dark-haired one with the great ass, the blonde with the nice tits, the redhead who'd probably be wildfire in the sack, or the quiet one who's bound to have a secret kinky side?"

Jesus Christ. Not even mushrooms could produce that sort of mind-blown glaze. Damn kid must have had access to something stronger; Sextus supposed he would have to inquire. "...She's the blonde."

Well, that was convenient. He had no idea where the hell the other three might have been. "Oh, she'd be in bed right now. Poor girl passed out during supper a couple nights ago and hasn't had more than a minute of consciousness since."

"...What?"

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