January 27, 2016

In Which Cladelia Instigates a Frame-Up

January 1, 1198

Still struggled to stand upright following the ordeal of changing into her nightgown, Alyss giggled. "I can't believe we're drunk!"

"You moreso than me," Cladelia mock-scolded her friend--though she couldn't deny that her bedroom was much blurrier than usual. But, she was the youngest child of older parents who had lost most of their will to discipline before she'd been secured in her mother's womb. Alyss was the third child, whose parents had still been young and eager to do everything just right. She would have been less drunk than Alyss, but not for lack of drink--more for the fact that she'd had considerably more practice.

Not that practice helped some people. "But neither of us moreso than Koradril!"

Alyss blinked, a couple extra seconds required to match the face to the name. She got it in the end, though. "Oh! Your brother! He's very drunk. Cute--but drunk."

"And yet we're the ones who get sent to bed right after midnight!" Because her lenient parents just had to spend New Years' with Medur and Ellie. Because her perfect older sister and her killjoy husband just had to be here instead.

"Hmm..." Alyss reached for her chin, but missed. "He's older; he's allowed to be as drunk as he wants? And he's a man!"

"He's not that much older--and drunk men are rude and violent. Drunk women are just fun, like us."

Alyss squinted. "We are?"

"Obviously!" Not that they had much opportunity to get up to anything fun when they'd been unceremoniously banished to her bedroom! Meanwhile, Koradril was still in the hall, translating their grandfather's book of hymns into armpit farts. "It's not fair. We ought to punish Koradril."

"But Mernolt's the one who sent us to bed!"

"My mother will deal with him--but we need to show that drunk men can do stupid things to. We should frame him for something."

"Oooh! A frame-up!" Alyss clapped in giddy pleasure, but then dropped her hands with a frown. "Wait, what are we framing him for?"

"Something only someone drunk and stupid would do. But what can we do from in here...?" Cladelia scanned the room in search of anything potentially incriminating. The parchment and ink at her desk was the only thing that came to mind. But, what could the parchment implicate him for? Stupid Koradril. Stupid older brother, with his manliness and his drinking privileges and his college friends who were--

"I've got it!" Cladelia rushed--or tried to, what with her damn feet and the slanting floor getting in the way--to the desk and sat down, her stumbling friend close behind. A steady chair did little for the motion of the room, but at least she could focus on the blank sheet in front of her.

"We're going to prank the Baron of Rexus."

She pulled her quill out of the inkwell and marked the date at the top--even if she did have to cross out '1197' as an afterthought. "'My dear friend Arkon'... see, he and Koradril are friends, so Koradril calls him 'Arkon'."

"Oooh! You're so clever, Cladelia." Alyss giggled again. "Now, what's the letter going to be about?"

"Hmm." What did she know about the Baron of Rexus? Well, she knew his name was Arkon. And that he and Koradril sometimes went to brothels. And that everyone in Dovia thought he ought to find himself a wife. "...'It grieves me to inform you, my friend, that a certain female schoolmate of ours... who shall remain nameless'..." Cladelia couldn't quite recall any of Koradril's female schoolmates at the moment. "...'has confided in me that you have impregnated her.'"

Alyss gasped. "Oh, my!"

Whether that exclamation was of shock or amusement, Cladelia continued. "'I can't be sure of the story, as I know we men never speak truthfully of our sexual exploits, but she is very upset and expects that you will claim responsibility for the child. Therefore, if you wish to get to the bottom of the matter, I would advise that you cut your holidays short and return to Naroni at your earliest convenience. Signed, your friend, Koradril Sadiel'."

"Cutting a baron's holidays short! Koradril is in trouble!" Alyss rubbed her hands together in glee as Cladelia set down the quill. "But we're not going to send it, are we? I mean, the poor baron didn't do anything."

Cladelia sniffed. "Everyone's done something."

"But we don't even know the baron!"

"Then we'll get to meet him when he shows up to see his secret lover." Cladelia folded up the letter and stamped it shut with a wax seal--rather more heavy-handedly than she would have sober, but Koradril was pretty heavy-handed. "Anyway, care for some more wine? I have a few flasks stashed away in my dresser."



Van said...

Cladelia is Tarien and Arydath's youngest. Alyss's parents are Setran and Evera.

Winter said...

Behold: Medieval slumber party crank calls!

This was too funny. Deep down, teenagers are the same in every century. I'm looking forward to the consequences of this. Maybe that woefully unattached baron will find a way to shut everyone up...

Van said...

Haha! More or less! XD

Yeah... even before the concept of teenagerhood was a widely-considered thing, there would have been bound to be some interesting consequences of being no longer a child but not quite an adult, no matter what the era. I don't know how well Cladelia or Alyss will remember this event, but I suspect Baron Arkon certainly will.