June 23, 1185
What the fuck did I do?
Or perhaps the better question was who the fuck did he just do. Or who the fuck had he just... fucked, for all it had felt like more than mere fucking. Of course, he already knew the answer to that.
I just had sex with a priest. Some stupid part of him hoping he'd imagined it, Casimiro cast a sidelong glance to the other half of the bed. Sure enough, there was the back of Sieron's pretty blond head, resting peacefully as if he hadn't just thrown his vows to the wind. Well, he's technically a monk, I guess... but still! A man of the cloth!
If he hadn't been hell-bound before, surely that fate was sealed now.
Or perhaps the better question was who the fuck did he just do. Or who the fuck had he just... fucked, for all it had felt like more than mere fucking. Of course, he already knew the answer to that.
I just had sex with a priest. Some stupid part of him hoping he'd imagined it, Casimiro cast a sidelong glance to the other half of the bed. Sure enough, there was the back of Sieron's pretty blond head, resting peacefully as if he hadn't just thrown his vows to the wind. Well, he's technically a monk, I guess... but still! A man of the cloth!
If he hadn't been hell-bound before, surely that fate was sealed now.
Casimiro slung his legs off the bed and fished up his braises with his toes. He stood up as he pulled them on, unable to shake the feeling that somewhere, someone was watching him. Must've been God.
Forgive me, Father--like I forgave you for making me this way. Though, fat lot of help that did him.
"Cas?" Behind him, Sieron rustled the sheets. "Are you all right?"
Forgive me, Father--like I forgave you for making me this way. Though, fat lot of help that did him.
"Cas?" Behind him, Sieron rustled the sheets. "Are you all right?"
Poor man. Perhaps Sieron's error had been in joining the church too young, before he'd known if that was what he truly wanted. That didn't make him any less a Man of God. "I'm sorry, Sieron. We--I shouldn't have done that."
"Why just you? I wasn't exactly an unwilling participant."
"Yes, but... what if I...?" How to put it? Ruined him? He hadn't asked before, but as the sex had occurred, he'd been left with the distinct impression that Sieron hadn't done that before. But 'ruined' just sounded twisted, dehumanizing. "Made God mad at you?"
"You think God has no more pressing concern than people making love? We oughtn't flatter ourselves like that, Cas--not when there are people starving and dying all over the world."
"The Bible seems to take issue with it, though."
"If the Bible was meant to be set in stone, God would have carved it Himself on the mountainside." Sieron's feet fell to the floorboards, the mattress settling back to form as his perfect ass rose from it. "The world is complex, Cas. Humanity is complex--and we know this because complex beings are capable of change. Those who believe God to be rigid do Him grave insult, assuming Him to be simple."
"Then why doesn't God commission an updated Holy Book?"
"Why just you? I wasn't exactly an unwilling participant."
"Yes, but... what if I...?" How to put it? Ruined him? He hadn't asked before, but as the sex had occurred, he'd been left with the distinct impression that Sieron hadn't done that before. But 'ruined' just sounded twisted, dehumanizing. "Made God mad at you?"
"You think God has no more pressing concern than people making love? We oughtn't flatter ourselves like that, Cas--not when there are people starving and dying all over the world."
"The Bible seems to take issue with it, though."
"If the Bible was meant to be set in stone, God would have carved it Himself on the mountainside." Sieron's feet fell to the floorboards, the mattress settling back to form as his perfect ass rose from it. "The world is complex, Cas. Humanity is complex--and we know this because complex beings are capable of change. Those who believe God to be rigid do Him grave insult, assuming Him to be simple."
"Then why doesn't God commission an updated Holy Book?"
"Because God wants us to figure these things out for ourselves." A smiling face looped around the bedpost, a gentle hand landed on his shoulder. Silky soft lips pressed to his own, parting with a widened grin. "For what better way is there to truly know God than to talk to him, question him? To inquire and to reason with the minds with which He blessed us?"
"But--"
"But what? God gave us sex. He created us with the capacity to enjoy sex, to want sex--almost all of us. Not just fertile men who marry fertile women, or vice versa. If sex was solely for the sake of future generations, why should it be pleasurable for the present?" One corner of his mouth tugged, eyelids flickering and widening upon open. Such a lovely blue. "Besides, God also gave us math--and math tells us that if every one of us could have children with our chosen partners, then it's only a matter of time before the earth is filled to capacity. Not all of us are meant to continue the species, but that doesn't mean we're not entitled to enjoy the physical act of love if we so choose."
That sounded... logical. Priests and monks were not often logical. Casimiro wasn't sure what to do with that.
"But--"
"But what? God gave us sex. He created us with the capacity to enjoy sex, to want sex--almost all of us. Not just fertile men who marry fertile women, or vice versa. If sex was solely for the sake of future generations, why should it be pleasurable for the present?" One corner of his mouth tugged, eyelids flickering and widening upon open. Such a lovely blue. "Besides, God also gave us math--and math tells us that if every one of us could have children with our chosen partners, then it's only a matter of time before the earth is filled to capacity. Not all of us are meant to continue the species, but that doesn't mean we're not entitled to enjoy the physical act of love if we so choose."
That sounded... logical. Priests and monks were not often logical. Casimiro wasn't sure what to do with that.
"You may just be the strangest man of the cloth I ever met." As he said it, it became all too clear in his mind that 'strange' was not an inherent insult. "Strangest, and most endearing."
NEXT CHAPTER:
NEXT CHAPTER:
8 comments:
Sorry that this wasn't up last night.
YES!! Oh, I like this guy! ^^ Sieron, you are entirely too great. Keep it up!
What a sweet thing to wake up to. Thank you Van!
Sooo, is Casimiro right? Was he a virgin? That's really curious considering how much time he has spent working out his philosophy where his religion and not just his sexuality but the act of it intersect. How old is Sieron again? Does he know that Cas's marriage is one of convenience? Er, and even if he does know, how does he feel about adultery? I kind of wish that we could have seen what lead up to this.
Okay, now how do we get Sieron to pay a visit to Sparron so that he can reiterate that exact. same. speech?!?
Come to think of it, Sparron could really use a friend like Sieron. Only somehow I imagine that he would reject Sieron once he found out that he was gay.
How does every comment I write always end up being about Sparron? LOL I'm as bad as Searle. Like, "Hmm, I've read the scenario and it was interesting, but how is it relevant to Sparron?"
[A] Silky soft lips pressed to his own, parting with a widened grin.
I can has karma?? (Save'n it for Severin Floriansson, who is full of win)
Ann: He is quite a different flavor from the bulk of religious figures in Naroni history, isn't he? He and Zaahir and Mother Elwyna are kind of the holy trinity of awesome.
Glad I could oblige. :)
Pen: Yes, Sieron was a virgin (he's twenty--older than most virgins, but not unheard of). But, he has spent a lot of time thinking about sex, and other more-or-less harmless "sins" that are a part of human nature and can indeed be beautiful. I don't know if it'll come up, but I imagine his subconscious has retained a memory of his mother's parting and that has stuck with him; and he's spent his life knowing that despite empirical evidence suggesting she was "bad", she did love him and did what she thought was best for both of them. So, he has a much less black-and-white outlook than many of his peers.
This was the first time they've had sex, they've known each other a while now, so I'm sure he knows that Casimiro's marriage is rooted in convenience, and that Ellona doesn't really care if he has affairs (though, her Sim did burst in on them in a fury during the shoot, since I forgot to turn off lot jealousy). I would imagine that Sieron's stance on adultery varies between relationships; he probably doesn't see Casimiro and Ellona's more-or-less open marriage as true adultery because, while they are good friends, they aren't in love and there's no sexual attraction.
Sparron does need to hear the exact same speech! I kind of wonder how Sparron would react to meeting another 100% gay male. He knows Casimiro, but he doesn't know he's gay (they don't interact much; he mainly knows Casimiro as Izzy's cousin). I doubt he's met Sieron, but it's not impossible that he will one day. On one hand, he might reject a friendship with another gay male on principle, but on the other, having a gay male friend could do him a world of good.
I won't pretend that I have not done that with characters in other people's works. XD I'm sure I drive Morgaine mad with many of my comments these days. "So, this scenario makes things easier for X and more difficult for Y... but how does it affect Delyth?"
D'oh! Thanks for the catch! (And oh boy oh boy oh boy do I have plans for Severin Floriansson!)
Entertaining update!
I think Casimiro was feeling a little unsure about what he just did or who he just did, heehee. But Sieron seemed quite content. :)
Thanks! :)
Yeah, Cas did catch a case of the post-coital angst there. Sieron... not so much. ;)
I love these two together. They're different enough to make it interesting, but they aren't maxing out the angst meter. (Not that there's anything wrong with that, but they're cute this way!)
I love the humility in Sieron's theology, too, and the perspective. He sounds like someone who is a monk for good reasons and takes it seriously. He's not wasted being educated, his access to religious texts, or the brains God gave him.
Yes, I'm enjoying them together too. They're not alike, but they do compliment each other well.
Sieron does not take his theology lightly, and I'm glad that shows. He's serious about his role and he enjoys it... but he isn't so arrogant to think that man should presume to make so many rules in the name of God. Definitely a thinking Christian.
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